Junior year of high school was my introduction to Thoreau. Some might consider that too late but I think otherwise. I think the core of his message, a message of finding something positive in loneliness is too deep or maybe to real to understand until you yourself can empathize with it. The message is not sad loneliness, but yet rooming oneself purposely from the very opposite, that being city life, full of people, full of social construct, full of social guidelines and expectations. In that he finds that there is something there in isolation, as if a forest where little happens has more than a city where everything happens. I did not understand this in high school, and even though I was only a few years younger than I am now, I understand it better now. To do what Thoreau did, a person must be willing to address how they feel about their setting, how that setting effects their life, and have no problem with realizing the negatives. Sure I agree with people who say “keep positive” but there is a point where if you don't find a sustained positivity in a place, a setting, than you have to accept that you need a change. Basically what Thoreau has done for me is underlined that when you feel you can no longer try adapting to a place, or a lifestyle, than look outside of that box. I do not know who said this but a wise friend once told me the journey is the destination because life is a journey and should never have an endpoint. I think this fits quite well with Thoreau because there was nothing wrong with him leaving his life, even if it meant he left society, it was part of his journey, his change, he was finally going on his journey. Some people never try to embark on their journey or even can, but for those who can, the idea that they will find a finish line and be done is ridiculous to me. This also does not make it alright for others to judge people journeys because like another wise friend once told me, which he was taught from his grandmother “never judge a life before you've lived one.” To that I say AMEN!
The Walk:
I was not able to disconnect very well on this walk, not nearly as much as the last walk. The park did feel like the best place to lose myself and tap into a deeper level of thought. In fact the statues did the opposite for me, they prevented me from feeling any nature around me. Thats not to say they were not nice statues, some not so nice in my opinion, but the park had too much of an emphasis on them to divide nature from depictions of people, nature, and irrelevant statues like the one of the man playing piano, I don’t know who it was. I walked to every part of the park to try and see, to intake everything before I could walk away disappointed. My problem was that it seemed to intentional, thats it. I understand the size is quite smaller than the last park but it is still lacking.
At the last park I remember being taken back to different places back home through nature and this park did the same for me. Whether Thoreau would see that as me successfully tranceding, I doubt it, but there are no open forests near here, so I’m working with what I have. I saw a bush/tree that is in my backyard at home that I had seen last week, and even though I usually hate it with a passion, I can’t help but stop and look at it, appreciate it, something I would never ever do back home. I have wanted it gone for years, 19 years, but now if it takes me back home this much, maybe I should accept and respect it. I see a few trees that are identical to ones along my driveway. They take me back. I am reminded of the time it snowed a foot or more and I decided to push snow off the top of one of my dads cars, the one I believe he loved the most. I ended up scratching a lot of the top, which was found out about a month later when all the snow melted. My dad got angry and asked if I had dragged something on top his car, to which I replied no way! I preceded to blame it on the small tree that branches had been resting on the car due to the wait of the snow. Good memory.
The Tree^^^
Continuing my walk, I saw a statue thing that I believe has some spiritual context but that is also in my backyard, at least a very similar version. I never really look at mine back home but I stare at this thing for I would say 5 minutes, I don’t know why, but I do. I remember lighting a candle and putting it inside the statues little open door but more remember hiding stuff in it because a tree and bush kind of hid it well. For me, not to sound dumb, when I am going on a walk with the intention to meditate, the presence of historical figures what ever medium that be through is not important o say the least.
As I walked out I had a moment with a few crows. I love crows, I really do have a thing for them. I feel like spiderman when he is around a spider or batman around bats. I specifically got a tattoo of a crow feather for their meaning and also just because I like them. Sounds very goth kid, but it’s true.
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